This Journey

Back from LA

Hello lovely followers.

I got back from LA on Sunday night after a long but fun week. I filmed three days total on the pilot I was working on- I’m only a guest star for a few episodes if it gets picked up. I can’t really share any details until I’m told that it is getting picked up. All I can say is that it’s a comedy and it’s hilarious. I had such a great time filming. The cast and crew were all so nice and caring.

When I wasn’t filming, I was driving around LA going from audition to audition. Since my Mom couldn’t come out with me this time, I was with a lovely woman with whom I’d worked with on ‘Lilith’ and ‘The Kings of Summer’.

I went to Venice Beach on Saturday afternoon and got a terrible sunburn which is just now starting to turn into a tan. I looked like a tomato for a few days.

Anyways, I’m back in North Carolina now with my family… spending most of my time doing school work. But hey, I can’t complain. I’ll be graduating later this year compared to next June if I had stayed in public school.

On a personal note, I’m happy to say that I have found the most wonderful and supportive boyfriend in the world and he makes me very, very happy. He lives back in my hometown in Ohio and I’m planning on visiting him and my other friends in a few weeks. Yay!

Changes.

I realized a few days ago that I never blogged about how I went to Los Angeles all last week for some auditions and callbacks. I initially went out there for 3 projects, and currently, I haven’t gotten 2 out of the 3. I’m still fighting hard for the last project, but it is a HUGE movie so God knows what will happen with that.

My lovely agent in LA set up a few meetings with casting directors and a few new auditions to make the most of the time I was out there. I have a good feeling about some of the projects I tried out for. I’m keeping my finger’s crossed and hoping that I get to work again really soon. One project shoots in LA and another one shoots in Utah. I guess we’ll see what happens!

On a different note… SCHOOL. My first day of Junior year starts tomorrow. Surprisingly, I don’t feel too much at the moment. I know I’ll probably have trouble falling asleep tonight just like every other kid. But I’m not feeling as anxious as I usually do. I’m not feeling blue or depressed like usual, I feel fine. It’s kind of a relief. I think I know the reason why I’m feeling this way.

Yesterday, I brought up the subject of ‘moving’ to my parents again. I told them how guilty I was feeling that we were separating our family just so I could graduate from high school in Ohio. I told them that honestly, I don’t care whether I stay here or not. There’s nothing here for me anymore. I have friends here that mean the absolute world to me, but it’s not worth putting my Dad’s job or the sake of my family at risk just so I can be with my friends. Families move around the world every single day, and soon we’ll just be one of those families. I’m ready now to go and start over again in North Carolina. There is a catch, though.

When I do go out there, I’m pretty sure I will go to an online school. The only reason I would do this is so I can graduate earlier and it will really help when I have to travel for work and auditions. The bad thing about this is… how the heck am I going to meet any new friends? It’s not fun being lonely and I would hate to feel that way at home. I do have my family, however, and I love them more than anything in the world.

I’m not exactly making a huge sacrifice. The only thing I’ll miss here is my friends. They are the only reason that I would want to stay here for 2 more years. But family is more important than anything to me, and I have to do what I have to do. There is too much on the line if we stay here and I’m not willing to risk it. I know it’s the right decision to leave Ohio and go to North Carolina for my Dad’s job. We need to be a family. My older sister will probably stay here in an apartment while she attends college. She will be the only one who stays in Ohio. We would have moved earlier I think if it wasn’t for my acting. We are always kind of waiting around to see if I’ll book this or that. If I book a project, my family will have to be separated again for a little while, but my parents are willing to make it work.

So the fact that I’ll most likely being moving in a few months, makes school just a little bit less of an issue. I know I won’t be stuck in public school for much longer now. No, I don’t really like homeschooling. At all. But it has become necessary for my job. I missed 40 days of school last year. 4O DAYS. And it was not a walk in the park, I’ll tell you that. I spent weeks trying to make up my work and communitcating with my teachers and all that crap. But if I am going to an online school, when I’m on set all I have to do is go on my laptop to do all of my work. It’s more convenient for me and my lifestyle at this time, so that’s what I have to do.

My friends are already telling me how much they’ll miss me and all of that, but I know they will move on. That’s what everyone does. We will still keep in touch and hopefully be friends for life, but it will be extremely hard saying goodbye to them. My friends are just like my family so I know they’ll always be in my heart. Forever. I’ve had some of the same friends for 10 years and I’ll never forget them.

In conclusion, moving is difficult and extremely hard. It proposes challenges in every aspect of life and is stressful for every member of a family in different ways. But at the end of the day, I will have lost nothing. My friends will always be in my heart and my family will stay by my side.

This is all just a part of my journey.

Life Update- moving, family, film.

Long time no blog.

I don’t blog much during the summer because, well, it’s summer. I rarely ever sit at my desk and go on the computer, but here I am!

So that’s a wrap on my latest film ‘Toy’s Film’! It wrapped almost a week ago. I was pretty sad to say goodbye to the cast and crew, like I always am when a project ends. I got to film with people who are actually my age, so that was a nice change! I made some great new friends and I will hopefully get to visit them next time I’m in LA, and God knows when that will be.

I’ve been getting a ton of great auditions lately, but one by one I’ve been told “It’s not going further.” As you can see, I haven’t gotten a ton of jobs at all yet in my career. It’s frustrating to not be working as much as I would like to. If it were up to me, I’d be working every single day. I do still have some amazing projects that I am waiting to hear back from. Keep your fingers crossed for me :)

School is coming up fast! This summer really flew by for me. I didn’t film much and I didn’t go on vacation so it was a pretty chilled out and relaxing summer. Like always, I’m feeling very anxious about starting another year. School has always been hard. I don’t exactly belong here. I was talking to my LA agent and she said to me, “People like you never fit in.” And it’s true. Anyone who is so passionate about anything and whose mind is in a far away place never really fits in. That’s how I am. It’s true that I don’t fit in at my school and I only have a very small group of friends. I’m friendly with people and try to reach out, but I’m turned down a lot because I think they get this idea that I’m a snob. THEY think that I think I’m “too good for everyone else.” Which is absolutely not true. I’m a shy person at school and I think people mistake that for me being snobby and not wanting to socialize with them. Understandable, though not the case.

I have been thinking a lot about my future lately. I posted a while ago that my family was moving to North Carolina, which isn’t the case now. My Mom and Dad agreed to let me finish high school here in Ohio before they moved. It’s a huge sacrifice that they made for me and I know that. It makes me realize how blessed I am that I care so much. I do feel guilty though considering that I hate school as much as I do. I watched my sister walk across a stage in June, get her diploma, and throw her graduation cap in the air with the rest of her class. It made me realize how much I wanted to do that too. I’ve been with my classmates for 16 years and even though I don’t exactly fit in, they’re a great and talented group of people that I would love to graduate with. I was telling my parents last night at dinner my plans for the future, and it went a little something like this:

“So. I guess I’m staying here for two more years of high school. And after that, I don’t think I’m going to rush off to Los Angeles like I thought I was going to. After I graduate, I’m going to help you move to North Carolina and help you get settled in. I want to spend time with you all before I move really far away.” My Dad added, “Oh you won’t be here for two more years. You’re not going to be here much longer.” It might seem like an odd thing to say, but it meant a lot. My Dad was really saying that he believes I’ll book something soon that will whisk me away from here. “We support you 100%. If you book something, Mom and Tess (my little sister) are going with you.” My Dad is currently living in North Carolina, and will continue to live there alone for the next two years while I graduate here. My Dad is sacrificing seeing his family so that I can finish school. I think he is the most incredible man I’ve ever known.

My Mom said that she and Tess wouldn’t move out to LA with me if I didn’t already have a paying job lined up there. Makes sense. Still, the fact that they are completely supportive just makes me so excited for my future. I know I have good things ahead of me, I can feel it.

I am just getting awfully unpatient here in Ohio. Every project that comes my way is another opportunity to escape and start living the life that I want to live. I’m ready for it to happen.

Toy’s House, Day #1 

It’s my first day on the set of my new film ‘Toy’s House’ which shoots here in Ohio! It’s great that I finally got a local job so I don’t have to travel. I got on set at 10:45am and now it’s 5:45pm… and I haven’t filmed anything yet. I’m not surprised though, that’s what happens on movie sets.

It’s been really cool so far because there are very experienced actors and actresses working on the film. Nick Offerman was one of the first celebrities to join the cast. He is a writer and actor for the show Parks and Recreation. Moises Arias who played Rico from Hannah Montana is in the cast and so is Gabriel Basso from the film ‘Super 8’. There are a few more celebrities working on the film as well and they are listed on the film’s IMDB page which I will post after this. Take a look!

Recording, Summer Job, Hollywood.

I’m in a recording studio today! It’s been quite a while since I’ve recorded a song. I’m singing a duet for a guy who lives in my town. His name is Cody and he is going to the Berkeley School of Music in the fall. He wanted to record an album before he went out there and I was happy to help out!
Cody hopes to put the album on iTunes eventually and if that happens of course I will share the link!

I’ve been dreadful when it comes to blogging lately, I know. My first excuse is that it’s summer! Second excuse, I’ve been pretty busy lately. Recording, sending in a ton of auditions, and just trying to be a teen and spend time with my friends.

I did find out last week though that I got myself a little job for the summer! A film is shooting in Cleveland during July and I got myself a supporting role. I think I film for about 4 days total but that’s alright. It’s something to do and it is more experience and exposure!

A little update on Gibsonburg:

Just last week it was shown in Hollywood at the Chinese Theatre. I wasn’t able to go because of school :(
I was upset that I couldn’t walk the red carpet and see my cast-mates, but maybe I’ll have another chance someday. The film is doing really well and getting great feedback! The director hopes to have it on Netflix this summer and show the film in some independent theaters.

It’s exciting :)

I’m in the process of auditioning for a huge show which happens to be my FAVORITE SHOW EVER. Maybe you can guess what it is, but I’m not going to come right out and say it. All I can do is pray, hope, and cross every limb on my body for this one! Please do the same!!

About to have a Skype interview with the director of a really funny movie that’s filming in Cleveland this summer.

Wish me luck!

Premiere and New York!

Ahhh. So depressing to come back to Cleveland after being in Florida.

The premiere for the movie ‘Not Waving But Drowning’ was this weekend! It was a lot of fun :) I flew to Tampa, Florida on Saturday with my Mom, my best friend, and her Mom. The premiere was that night, so we were all kind of exhausted. The film looked really beautiful. It’s the first movie I’ve seen so far with me in it!

Pretty weird to see my face on the big screen! I was pretty nervous before the movie… especially about the kissing scene haha! But all went well.

Considering the film started after 10pm and ended past 12am, I was too tired to go to the after party.

We all woke up late on Sunday morning and headed to the beach! It was a beautiful day.. 85 and sunny :) Perfect! We could only stay for a little while since our first flight was at 7pm. Overall, it was a fun weekend and I’m really impressed with how the film turned out. I also feel good about my acting in the film which makes me happy. I gave the best performance I could.

Other than that! I am headed to New York City after school tomorrow! I have two callbacks! :) YAYAYAYAYY. Also a few meetings with more casting directors. It should be fun! So for the next few days, I’m on vocal rest. My big audition is on Friday and I have to hit some pretty high notes!

So wish me luck and keep me in your prayers! :)